Musicals: Quick Versions
Ex-criminal can't catch a fucking break. Crazy cop can't handle multi-dimensional personalities. Boring love interest remains everyone's least favorite character. Everyone you love dies.
The Phantom of the Opera:
Overly dramatic opera singer is caught between a dick boyfriend and a serious case of Stockholm syndrome.
Misunderstood loner chick tries to help people and everyone fucks her over anyway.
West Side Story:
Romeo and Juliet with really tame gangs and sassy Puerto Ricans.
If your asshole love interest doesn't like your personality, change everything about yourself.
Freaky looking cats. That's it. There's literally no plot.
WHAT THE FUCK
SOMEONE CAME UP FOR THE IDEA OF THIS.
SOMEONE WROTE A SCRIPT FOR THIS.
SOMEONE UTTERED THESE WORDS INTO A MICROPHONE.
SOMEONE ANIMATED THIS.
SOMEONE GREENLIGHTED THIS.
SOMEONE DIRECTED THIS.
SOMEONE PRODUCED THIS.
DID NOT ONE PERSON EVER STOP TO THINK THAT MAYBE THIS WAS A TERRIBLE IDEA?
yes hello this is your pilot speaking and by pilot i mean i read a wikihow on flying a plane once so i guess ill just have to WING it haha just a little pilot humor okie dokie nothing to worry about folks im sure i can figure this out
wouldnt it be fucking scary if you had a clock that counted down until the moment you die. like what if it could be altered too like one day it says 70 years left but then you do something and it says 10 minutes left and youre like what the fuck i fucked up i fucked up i fucked up
what if you got on a plane and then as soon as it took off everybodys clock changed to 20 minutes
PETITION TO MAKE THIS INTO A MOVIE
Yes but why are all the really fun roles in musicals for guys?
•Gabe from Next to Normal
•Jack from Newsies
•Elder Price from The Book of Mormon
•Link from Hairspray
•Enjolras from Les Mis
I don’t get it??????